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Let’s be honest: 2011 was a tough year. Hardship, defeat, and self-discovery that led to a myriad of difficult discussions and soul searching… I battled bouts of depression and struggled to make myself less of a ‘broken’ individual. (The jury’s still out on that last one.) I fought my way through tough decisions and daily battles regarding health, home, family, and career… At the end of it all, I do believe December has been the toughest month to get through so far, and I sincerely hope fairer waters are ahead…

But certainly good things happened in 2011. With twenty minutes left to go, I can look back and know that 2011 was landmark:

In music:
I built my music career up again, performing and making over 20 professional appearances.
I have written seventeen songs, and have started work on number eighteen.
I put together a CD of my own, fulfilling a dream of mine since junior high.

In writing:
I pursued the very thing I was most afraid to try (lyrics).
I broke barriers, baring parts of myself I never thought I’d ever be able to talk about. Lyric gave me freedom to do so. And in doing so…

I have acknowledged the dark, derelict, and destroyed parts of my soul.
Most importantly, I have made steps to heal.

I still have a long way to go. The scars of childhood don’t go away easily, and I’m well aware it’s going to be a long haul to wholeness. But I’ve found my music again. Like a best friend, we’ve pretty much picked up right were we left off. Music is going to help me with healing, in addition to simply being a spot of joy among daily trials. You, too, are helping me with that, because every time you say one of my songs has touched you, made you smile, feel relieved, or just feel, it reminds me that we’re all human and none of us are alone.

Here’s to a better year.

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2 thoughts on “2011

  1. Heather, there is so much of what you say above, that I could have said myself about my own life. This line “The scars of childhood don’t go away easily” struck me because I too have deep scars from my childhood. I’m so glad you found your music again, it will heal you. Music is healing me too, though in a different way, for I do not have the desire to perform at the moment, but talking and listening to music has been a great inspiration and has helped me cope.

    Here’s wishing that 2012 is a great year for you, and that you manage to leave whatever troubles you in the past 🙂

    1. Thank you so much, Alannah. Music *is* healing. Songwriting has done so much more for me this last year than all of the misplaced advice I’ve received over the years… it’s therapeutic. Being able to put emotions and thoughts out there in a format that is widely acceptable (and mostly free of repercussions) helps me get these things off my chest for good so I can finally move forward. Music is amazing. 🙂

      Best wishes to you, too, for a better 2012! 🙂

       

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